A Practical Guide to Human Rights in Islam

Haqooq ul Ibad

 

 
 Chapter 25

 Firmed promise (qoal e sadid)

We were discussing that we ask our wives to do things that are not required of them, and we would resent if we had to do those things ourselves.  We have borrowed these things from some non-Muslims. Things such as touching other’s feet and sense of superiority to others.  We do not find any such examples in the life of the prophet (pubh).  He did the same things as he expected from others rather more so.  You must remember the time when he (pubh) was involved in the digging of ditches preparations for the Battle of the Ditch (Khundak).  He carried rocks along with other people.  His companions were very hungry so they tied stone to their stomachs so that they will feel less hunger.  At that time, the prophet being hungry too, he (pubh) tied two stones to his stomach.  Such is the example of commendable human behavior and look at the leaders we have now.  How can we expect the same results as were at the time of the prophet (pbuh).   Our prophet (pbuh) not only upheld human rights, he took care of the animal rights too.  Here, in the case of your wife, you can only ask for what she is expected to do and only what she willingly accepts.  Not only that, you should commend her for doing extra things to help you out.  Here we should also consider her difference in bodily makeup, because each month she has to face a time when she is not at her best and gets head aches, body aches, or weakened memory.  This is the reason why two women’s witness is required so that if one forgets the other one can remind her.  It is explained in quran as "if one forgets then the other will remind her".  Enemies of Islam, to be derogatory to women, misconstrued this reason. 

Here I will bring up another allegation of the enemies of Islam that, why does a woman has half a share in inheritance?   This is not derogatory to women; instead there is rationality to it.  Since the women are not expected to earn, and if they do the man has no right to her earning and at the same time he has to take care of all the monetary requirements of the family.  Thus it is not surprising that he is given more in inheritance.  We must remember that the Islam gave equality to women over 1400 years ago, while in other cultures, she was not even asked when decisions were made about her.  Duels were fought for women and their right to vote was accepted only about 60 years ago.  In Islamic history a women (Aisha RA) lead 40 thousand soldiers (  mostly companions of prophet (pubh)) in the Battle of Jamal and none of the men objected to that.  

In all this discussion, my objective was to say that when we are dealing with somebody we need to know the sensitivity and habits of the person otherwise it would cause difficulties.  No two individuals are alike; moreover, here we are dealing with the opposite sex.  We cannot base our dealings on guesses because it is possible that the other person may not have the same qualities that you have. The Quran says, “A person may not have all the good qualities, however in spite of all the bad qualities there may be some qualities which may be good for you only.    

Here a story may not be out of place.  Somebody had heard the fame of an old respectable man so he went to see him.  After a long journey he went to the man’s house.  After knocking at the door he called for the person by name and asked if the Sheikh was at home.  His wife heard the voice and replied, “Who the hell do you call Sheikh?” and bad mouthed about her husband.  At this he asked the lady if she knew where he had gone because he did want to meet him after this long journey.  At this the lady again bad mouthed her husband and told the man that he has gone to jungle to collect firewood.  When he went towards the jungle he saw that the old man is walking behind a lion that is carrying the man’s firewood on his back.  So he told the old man what had happened at his home and asked him what the reason that his wife scolded him was, but here a lion is obediently carrying his firewood.  The old man said that ALLAH has blessed him with lion as a reward for his treatment by his wife and his pacien  patience ( sabr).  The moral of the story is that live the life as best as you can and Allah may reward you for this patience. You being the head of the house carries more burden on your shoulders and will be asked about fulfillment of your responsibilities while, for the same reason, your wife may not be answerable to these.

 

Send questions or comments to M. Rafiq & S. Pervaiz